Idiot Driver #2

To the driver of green Chevrolet mini-pickup with Texas tags 56K JJ1….

Frankly my dear, you are a freaking moron.  Not only did you pull out in front of me while I’m drving along in one of these, which weighs approximately twice what your tiny excuse for a pickup does, you pulled out across three other lanes of on coming traffic to do it.  I’ll direct you to a photo that shows the pick up in relation to a small sports car convertible so that you ahve a frame of reference.  Basically, this thing isn’t any bigger than the Honda who swerved to miss him and only slightly larger than something I’d consider using as a hood ornament.

You were completely oblivious to the Honda, the Toyota, and the Saturn who were west-bound, even though all three of them locked their brakes up to keep from slamming into you.  That still didn’t seem to your attention away from what ever it was in the front seat that you were screwing around with.  As I’m going east, I hear the brakes on the other side of the road and see you coming, so I manage to avoid you as well, you dork.  But unlike the others, I actually honk at your stupid ass, which seemed to startle you back into reality, if only for a moment.  Perhaps if your windows weren’t tinted so darkly you might actually be able to see out and see the on-rushing cars coming at you.

Sadly, your near death experience had no effect on you.  After going to some trouble to get the hell away from you, you were last seen in my rear view mirror swerving into both lanes of traffic as you continued to tinker with what ever it was in the front seat that was far more important than any of us staying alive. 


Retarded Jackass In A Car

If you happen to be the driver of the blue PT Crusier with the Texas tags X01 NTZ, please…really…do us all a favor and actually LOOK AT THE  ROAD while the car is moving.  Driving 60 MPH turned around backward, screwing with your kids in the backseat isn’t conducive to any of us remaining alive.  That includes you, your precious children, and my main concern – me.  If you’re too stupid to drive properly, then you earned your Darwin award.  I don’t want to die because you want to be an idiot. 

I’ve decided that I’m going to start taking down the license plate number of every retard I see on the road and start blogging about what I see you doing.  Hopefully, your insurance company will find this information and raise your rates accordingly. 

Retarded Drivers – Why You Should Keep Your Dogs In A Crate

I was an eye witness to a pretty horrific traffic accident this weekend.  We were driving down a country road near our house.  It’s a two lane highway with just the old yellow stripe down the middle.  We’re going east when we see a car in the west bound lane swerve suddenly off the road.  Instead of slowing down, the car actually accelerates passing cars still on the road while driving in the ditch.  Keep in mind that the speed limit here is 60 mph. 

Now, this is a road where people put in concrete drainage culverts so that they can put their driveway on top them without blocking the flow of water down the ditch.  Knowing that this can’t end well, I turn to watch.  The PT Cruiser continues to accelerate until it hits one of these mini-culverts at somewhere between 70 and 80 mph.  The impact sends the car several feet into the air where it proceeds to make a nice end over end flip and finally comes to rest on it’s wheels.  The drivers of the car behind us had pulled off and pretty much jammed on the brakes, fearing that her car was going to continue to roll and perhaps strike them. 

We pull over and run to help the driver because I’m heavily trained in first aid and we have both a nurse and an off-duty sheriff’s deputy with us.  The car is destroyed.  The woman who was driving was badly injured.  The cause of the accident – her two shihtzus running loose in the car.  One of them had gotten under her feet and jammed the accelerator pedal. 

So the moral of the story here is that this woman nearly died and could easily have taken several other people with her just because she didn’t want to put the dogs in a crate while she’s driving.  Look people, NONE of us want to die because YOU want to be dumbass.