Note on Maven Error Messages

This is quite possibly the most useless error help message ever… which is saying something, given some of Microsoft’s utterly useless errors.

[ERROR] To see the full stack trace of the errors, re-run Maven with the -e switch.
[ERROR] Re-run Maven using the -X switch to enable full debug logging.
[ERROR]
[ERROR] For more information about the errors and possible solutions, please read the following articles:
[ERROR] [Help 1] http://cwiki.apache.org/confluence/display/MAVEN/MojoExecutionException

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GateIn on Ubuntu

Well, this is off to a fantastic start </end sarcasm>.  I can’t even download their zip file.  They’ve got so many redirects going so that all these people can see who is downloading and how often.  Unfortunately, its keeping me from getting the file.  If you can’t get a simple download right, how good can your product be?  Oh, well… we’ll be finding out another day.  After I figure out how to get my hands on it. 

Most Retarded Product 2008 – Challenge

Everyone wants a challenge it seems.  I want everyone to nominate a completely and utterly useless product.  Please explain why in 2 paragraphs or less this is a totally useless product.  Time stamps will be used to determine who picks an entry first.

As for me, I’d like to offer up TruckNutz as the most useless product for 2008 and possibly ever. 

Their only function is supposedly decorative, but I fail to see how having fake plastic testicles on your trailer hitch is decorative.  I’m not sure what’s more disturbing – the fact that people actually buy these things or that they come in a selection of colors.  If you live in a trailer park and want to announce to the world that your family tree is more of a family braid, I suppose these are the perfect accessory. I mean, after all, god forbid you spend the money on something useful like a tornado shelter.

How do you deal with unpleasant neighbors?

Speaking as THE ONE AND ONLY QUEEN BITCH OF THE UNIVERSE:

I deal with unpleasant neighbors by proving to them that I can be far more unpleasant than they can.  I’ve found that the good old fashioned object lesson is far more useful than pleas that fall on deaf ears.  See, I have this theory.  People act like assholes because it’s illegal to smack the living shit out of them.  They think they can get away with it.   And they often do until they run into me. *Smirk*

I will tell you about my latest experience with some unpleasant neighbors.  They always have loud parties every single weekend and I don’t usually mind too much. When we first moved in to our new house, we made a point of going to meet the new neighbors then.  We weren’t particularly overwhelmed by them then.

However, three of their parties ago, my husband left to attend a function.  I wasn’t feeling well so I stayed home.  One of their party goers comes over, rings my doorbell, and has the nerve to say, “Hey, baby…. Your husband isn’t home.  Why don’t you come over and join the party?”  Grrrrrrr………

Their last party was conducted in the front yard.  It involved some amplifiers and the worst Tejano band I’ve ever heard in my life playing until about 2:30 AM.  For those of you that know me, you know I hate Tejano.  I hate Tejano because it sounds like polka.  And I despise polka.  WTF???  Lawence Welk is DEAD!!!!  Even more annoying was how really indescribably horrible the band is.  I’m a classically trained musician.  While I might not like some styles of music, I can at least appreciate technical ability.  They didn’t have that either.  I don’t think that all of the band members were playing the same song at the same time.  Nor were the band members playing at the same tempo or in teh same key.  Yet all of this is being piped through amplifiers, which makes it sound soooo much better.  It’s so loud that I can’t get away from it anywhere in my house.  GAHHH!!!!  I AM IN HELLLL!!!!

Their payback is coming….  They’re Catholic.  I own real PA cabinets (4′ tall x 4′ long x 2′ deep and cabinets as in plural) along with the gear to drive them – at full volume.  Not some wimpy little Marshall amps that you could tuck under your arm and carry around.  I’ve been gathering a nice selection of the most offensive music I can manage.  One song is titled “The Virgin Mary is a Whore”.   Another is “The Devil Does Drugs”.  I wonder how they’ll like it when I drag out the PA cabinets and start blasting that at 4:30 in the morning after their next drunk fest. 

Bikini Lawn Service

I’ve maintained for a long time now that women are their own worst enemies.  Too many of our sisters “shake that money maker” for a few dollars.  Another case in point is a lawn service in Tennessee.  The lawn service is run by women and they mow in bikinis.  They’ve even said that they’ll come rake leaves in the fall in bikinis.  Rather than doing a better job, they flash a little skin and get paid.  It sounds like another exploitative profession – topless dancing.  Why not just slap a price tag on your ass and stand on the corner while you’re at it?  How are men supposed to respect us when we keep trading on our sexuality to get a few extra bucks?

I’m Baaaack and It’s Time to Talk About Global Warming Again

I’m really tired of hearing about something that we know, if we are honest with ourselves, that we do not understand.  In the course of it’s history, the earth has been a total snowball and a ball of fire.  Right now, we’re in a pretty happy medium.  The ball of fire was caused by a meteor strike and the snowball was caused most directly by a change in oceanic currents.  Now, I don’t know about you, but humans are still far to puny to change the oceanic currents. 

Given that our planet is subject to these extremes and has been since long (billions of years) before the rise of man, I find it odd that we automatically assume that global warming is anything we’re doing.  Let’s run through a little math here, people.


Cars –

Car – average mileage for a car per year – 8,000.  That’s in the USA – one of the most car friendly and car per capita dense places on the entire planet.  A worst case scenario is that the entire planet mimics us so we’ll pretend for a moment that cars and roads and gas stations cover the planet, even though anyone who’s ever been to Africa or South American can tell you otherwise.  This is quite likely a complete overestimation. 

Best estimates place the number of cars in operation, planet wide at about 51,000,000.  That’s 51 million if you don’t deal well with zeros. 

51,000,000 x 8000 = 408,000,000,000 miles for all cars per year

408,000,000,000 x 8.51 ounces of CO2 per mile =  3,472,080,000,000 ounce of CO2 per year for all cars

Divide by 16 to get pounds (16 oz per pound)  = 217,050,000,000 pounds

Divide by 2000 (2000 pounds per ton) = 108,502,500 tons of CO2 per year from every single car on the planet


 Now for the humans

We exhale 2.2 pounds of CO2 per day.  That’s pretty average for a person and rest.  We know that the entire world is lying about on it’s backside, 24×7.  My point here is that the real numbers are probably much higher given the significant portion of the world’s population that’s engaged in manual labor on a daily basis.

2.2 x 365 (days per year) =  912.5 pounds per year per person

912.5 x 6,727,408,462 (best estimate of earth’s population) =  6,138,760,190,550 pounds

Divide by 2000 = 3,069,380,095.275 tons


Now for volcanoes

Volcanic activity has long been know to be a driving factor in the earth’s natural climatic shifts.  The best conservative estimate put the amount of CO2 from surface volcanoes (the only ones we can measure) at 12,416,434,600,000 ounces per year.

Divide by 16 = 776,027,162,500 pounds or 388,013,581 tons or nearly quadruple what all the cars on the planet are putting off. 

Keep in mind that these are just surface volcanoes and do not include the deep oceanic volcanoes which are the ones that are mainly responsible for stirring up CO2 from the ocean depths and sending it back into the atmosphere.


Coal Fired Power Plants

Now, keep in mind that most of the coal pollution comes from unchecked mine fires that are burning in China and India.  These fires are so bad that they’ve created a crop & human killing near permanent pall of smog, acid, and general ickiness that runs from China to Sri Lanka in places.  Many of these coal fires, like the Australian “Burning Mountain” are natural occurences.  Scientists estimate that “Burning Mountain” has been burning for around 6000 years.  One fire in China started in 1874 and wasn’t able to be extingusihed until 2004.  Another fire there has been going since the 1600’s and is largely unabated.  Since these appear to be largely natural phenonemon, I will not be including them in my calucations for coal fired power plants.  We’re far more concerned with man made CO2 here.  I’ll cover the naturally occuring coal fires below. 

Now, here in the good old USA where we have every electrical convienence known to man – electric can openers, the electric wheel chair (a.k.a. I’m too fat and lazy to walk through Wal-Mart), the electric air freshner, electric litter boxes, the electric stapler…you get the idea.  I know that the electric wheel chair isn’t a luxury for some of you, but I have to tell you.  Almost every one I’ve ever seen in one would benefit greatly from having the handicapped spaces moved to the back of the lot and doing a bit of walking while they shop.  In any even, we use more electricity per capita that anywhere else on earth, so these numbers are quite likely much higher than reality.

According to the PUC (Public Utilities Comission) Texans use enough energy that we’re responsbible for 7.45 pounds of CO2 per person per year for our electricity.  Most, but not all of the electricity, in Texas comes from coal. 

7.45 x 6,727,408,462 = 50119193042 pounds of CO2 per year or 25,059,597 tons of CO2 per year.  This is about 1/4 of what cars put off. 


Naturally Occuring Coal Fires

Estimates show that about 200 million metric tons of coal burns annually in naturally occuring fires.  Now our first step is to convert this into regualr tons.  That works to about 221 regular (short) tons.  The ratio of CO2 per pound of coal is 2.84.  It comes out higher because of the two oxygen atoms that get added to each carbon during combustion.  Given the fact that sattelite photography is now uncovering all sorts of new, previously unknown coal fires in these regions, these numbers are quite likely to be extremely low, perhaps 25% or less of what reality will reflect.

221 million tons x .9 (coal is only about 90% carbon) = 19895000 x 2.84 = 563,988,658 tons of CO2 per year.  This is about 5 times what all the cars on the planet put off and about 20 times what the well controlled burn in a coal fired power plant puts off. 


Final Score Board (CO2 emissions in Tons Per Year)
All Cars on Planet Earth – 108,502,500
Surface Volcanoes – 388,013,581
Exhaling Humans – 3,069,380,095
Coal Fired Power Plants – 25,059,597
Naturally Occuring Coal Fires – 563,988,658


As you can see from the numbers above, humans exahaling exceeds the CO2 output of every single car on the planet by orders of magnitude.  People exhaling puts out nearly 30 times the CO2 of every single car on the planet.  Surface volcanoes put out nearly 4 times the CO2 of every single car on the planet yet this isn’t something that humans can effect.  We can barely predict when they will erupt much less control them.  And CO2 isn’t the only thing that volcanoes put out.  They pump millions of tons of ash into the air each year which has tremendous effects on global weather patterns.  Even so, CO2 is being touted by the global warming alarmists as the big culprit in climate change.  This being the case, the best thing that all you tree hugging global warming yahoos can do to “stop global warming” is to just stop breathing.  And when you do that, try to be sure to position your corpse so that you can decompose over some seeds.  Turning yourself into the same fertilizer that you spout would be your best bet to help the rest of us out.

Car Jackers – Sort of

It seems that some teenage car jackers were stymied by the fact that the car they tried to jack was a standard stick-shift instead of an automatic.  First off, having a sub-par IQ seems to be pretty standard equipment for most criminals.  Apparently, they didn’t even know that stick shift existed, much less that they should avoid it because they couldn’t operate it.  Further evidence of their low IQ.  While they were trying to figure out how to start the car, police arrived and arrested them.  Can you say strike one, boys?