Some pants….that’s right, you heard it correctly. $67 MILLION dollars for some pants. Apparently a lawyer and judge by the name of Roy Pearson in Washington, DC is suing a small family owned dry cleaner for $67 million dollars for loosing a pair of his pants. Lest you think I’m making this up, here’s a link to ABC News.
Based on the fact that no one would take his case, this yahoo has decided to manage it himself. He’s suing in civil court for an amount that is 83,750 times the cost of replacing the pants. Yet in his lawsuit against the Choong family (the owners of the dry cleaners), he is claiming that they’ve defrauded him. They’ve offered to settle with him for several thousands of dollars up to $12,000. They’ve located his missing pants and offered to return them. So far, he’s refused to settle for anything short of his $67 million dollars. Who’s defrauding who, Mr. Pearson?
How, you may ask did Mr. Pearson arrive at this number? Well, lets see, apparently he feels that the Choongs should pay for him to rent a car so that he can use a different dry cleaner every week end for the next ten years. Doesn’t he own a car? He is a judge after all. Surely he can afford a car. Now, I’ve seen photos of this guy. Maybe he needs a special car for that extra wide a$$ of his. Personally, I think he’d get more out of walking a few extra blocks to a different dry cleaner. Then he wouldn’t need the special car for his extra wide a$$.
He’s also alleging pain and suffering since he didn’t get to wear his favorite suit on his first day at work. Now I have to tell you that grey pants with red & blue pin strips seem more like pimp-wear than judge-wear. If you’re so insecure that you have to have your favorite outfit in order to do your job, maybe you aren’t in the right line of work. And, frankly, I can’t imagine being upset about loosing a pair of pants like that or anyone who is unintellingent enough to consider such an item to be the height of fashion. They really sound like they should be accessorized with a furry hat, feather boa, and platform shoes.
He’s also claiming that something that can never be replaced was taken from him. When I first read this, I thought he meant that he’d left his brain in the pocket of said pants. It appears to be small enough to be easily misplaced. A few more sentences revealed that this was not the case. If any woman has been de-flowered by Roy Pearson, please contact me. I’m sure that you’d like sue him for dissatisfaction and the loss of some thing that can never be replaced. I’m also sure that the Choongs would be happy to help you sue him
Part of the reason that he’s upset is that the other suits that he
owned were “too tight”, which brings us back to walking a few extra
blocks to a different dry cleaner. Had he been doing this, he other
suits might have fit him and he might not have lost his pants. Besides, does he really need to wear pants? Won’t his judical robes hide his lack of pants?
Furthermore, this isn’t the first time. He’s also suing for some $550,000 in legal fees even though he’s representing himself. (Guess he hasn’t heard of the old adage about lawyers who represent themselves). His divorce decree shows that there was a rather large award made to his ex-wife because of the excessive and protracted litigation causing an increase in fees. Furthermore, he demands, in an appeal of his divorce, that the judge who oversaw the original be disciplined for not agreeing with him and approving several of his motions. Given his demands of other judges, I demand that he be removed from the bench and disbarred for unethical behavior. He’s also used to demanding money from people – it seems that he expected his wife to pay him spousal support. His “standard tactics” seem to be to flood someone with paper and hope to win that way. Any third year law student can do that – leading me to think that his brain really is in the pocket of those pants.
The Choongs have spent thousands of dollars defending themselves from this jackass. How this man is allowed to sit on a bench and pass judgment on anyone is beyond me. What Mr. Pearson is doing is extortion, harassment, and abuse of power. I would like to know why he hasn’t been dis-robed and disbarred for his conduct. I suspect that he’s picking on the Choongs because they’re Asian immigrants. I think he should have to take his pants and pay their legal fees. I sincerely hope that the Choongs file their own suit for frivolous legal action against Mr. Pearson.