Now that one of the In-DUH-viduals that I know with has managed to suck some of the joy out of Christmas, it’s time for me to go shopping. We’re having “Secret Santas” and guess who’s name I pulled. You guessed it! The In-DUH-vidual. Mind you, I happen to know that this particular person, who I shall call K.Y.(names have been changed to protect the stupid) has the big plastic nativity in their front yard. Personally, I’m having a hard time not adding some blow up sheep to the display and swapping the baby in the manger for the “china girl” love doll. Mostly because I just want to do something profane to the display because of how much it will annoy them, and that’s about the most profane thing I can think of.
The big question then becomes, what do I get K.Y. for the gift exchange. There’s a twenty dollar limit so it can’t be too extravagant, but I’m wondering about what to get all the same. My first thought was that perhaps if I get something with batteries that this person’s outlook on life might improve slightly. However, K.Y. might not appreciate such a gift since this person had a strict religious upbringing and might be too uptight. Then I thought about a religious gift, but decided that I don’t want to encourage them in their bullheaded poo. Having discarded those to possibilities, I have finally decided on a gift. Just in case K.Y. stumbles across this, I’m not telling any of you what it is until Christmas. If you’d like to make suggestions on what to get K.Y., please feel free do so as a comment.